The Hairy Crab Desert Classic
April 28- May 2 2024
Palm Springs, CA
Feherty Quotes:“Fortunately, he (Rory) is 22 years old so his right wrist should be the strongest muscle in his body.”
“That ball is so far left, Lassie couldn’t find it if it was wrapped in bacon.”
“I am sorry Nick Faldo couldn’t be here this week. He is attending the birth of his next wife.”
“They don’t do comedy at the Masters. The Masters, for me, is like holding onto a really big collection of gas for a week. It’s like having my buttocks surgically clenched at Augusta General Hospital on Wednesday, and surgically unclenched on Monday on the way to Hilton Head.”
Jim Furyk’s swing - “It looks like an octopus falling out of a tree.”
“He’s (Luke Donald) a bloody walking ATM. I slid my AmEx between the cheeks of his ass and out popped $500.”
Describing VJ's prodigious practice regime - "VJ hits more balls than Elton John's chin."
"That's a great shot with that swing."
"It's OK - the bunker stopped it."
At Augusta 2011 - "It's just a glorious day. The only way to ruin a day like this would be to play golf on it."
"That was a great shot - if they'd put the pin there today."
"Everything moves except his bowels."
"Watching Phil Mickelson play golf is like watching a drunk chasing a balloon near the edge of a cliff."
"That green appears smaller than a Pygmie's nipple".
You are playing in the state championship tournament and your match is all square after 17 holes. You had the honor and hit your drive two hundred and seventy five yards to the middle of the fairway, leaving a an eight iron to the pin. Your opponent hits his drive deep into the woods to the right of the fairway. You help your opponent look for his ball. Just before the permitted five minute search period ends, your opponent says: "Go ahead and hit your second shot and if I don't find it in time, I'll concede the match."
You hit a great 8 iron about ten feet from the pin. You then hear your opponent yell, "I found it!" followed by the sound of a club striking a ball. You opponents ball lands six inches from the pin.
Here is the question:
Do you pull your cheating opponent's ball out of your pocket and confront him or do you keep your mouth shut..??
